086: Robin Hood (2010)

Title: Robin Hood (2010)
Starring: Russell Crowe, Cate Blanchett, Mark Strong
Directed By: Ridley Scott

Genre films often come with certain expectations built in. The audience is told in the trailer what sorts of emotions they should expect. When I think of how I should feel while watching a Ridley Scott/Russell Crowe epic, the last thing that comes to mind is bored. But unfortunately, that's what happened to me for the majority of this movie.

I think it starts with the cast being generally too old. This is an origin story of sorts; a prequel to the Robin Hood legends that we all know. We're shown here the path that Robin takes to become the lovable outlaw defending the poor people of England. So why is 46-year-old Russel Crowe playing the character? In the time when this story takes place, wouldn't 46 have been a fairly long life? It just struck me as odd to see him playing such a youthful character.

What was even more odd is that the filmmakers decided to make everyone around Robin older as well, so it wouldn't look obvious that they shouldn't have gone with Crowe. In the story, Friar Tuck is just taking over a parish of his own. So he should be a relatively younger looking, if a bit portly man. In this he's played by Mark Addy (whom I really like, especially in this role), who in real life is three months OLDER than Russel Crowe. Robin's crew of Little John, Will Scarlett and Allan A'Dale are played by Kevin Durand (36), Scott Grimes (39) and Alan Doyle (41) respectively. While I do like their casting in these roles, I just can't get over the time in which this story supposedly takes place. If this were to become a franchise, these actors would be bringing some of the most famous and beloved moments of the Robin Hood legend to the screen when they're in their 40's and 50's. I just can't imagine that that would look believable.

The other major problem that I had with this re-imagining was the battle sequences. The story is sandwiched between two epic battle scenes. We start with Robin and the gang in the crusades, fighting along King Richard and we end with Robin and the gang leading an opposition force against the invading French military. Both of these scenes work on their own, and are exactly what you'd expect from Ridley Scott. The man makes exciting battles with LOTS of people in them. But here, the first is used to introduce us to the characters so there's never really a sense of danger. We KNOW they'll be okay. And with the final battle, Marion (41-year-old Cate Blanchett) leads a team of lost boys (all on RIDICULOUS looking miniature horses, as if we needed to further accentuate their youth and small stature) into the fray and ANY credibility the film was still clinging to is lost. These boys have so far in the film had ZERO contact with anyone in society, yet here they are being led into battle by our heroine. We were already rooting for England, we don't need an added element of concern for the safety of the ONE woman and ONLY children in the ENTIRE movie. It was quite dumb. It got even worse when we realize that Marion actually can't fight, so she just becomes the damsel in distress; which feels COMPLETELY out of place in this epic Ridley Scott battle sequence! We aren't even shown the fighting of the children, because up until now we haven't focused on a single one of them, therefore we don't CARE about them. Their involvement in the scene (Marion's included) is utterly jarring. It adds characters we don't need to a situation they don't belong in. It was just stupid. We DID get some pretty cool moments from our villain (the amazing Mark Strong) at their expense though, so I guess there's that.

All in all, the few things this movie got right just couldn't make up for how wrong it all felt. It was too epic for its own good in parts, too cheesy to be taken seriously and the cast was too OLD to be believable. I wasn't expecting much in the first place, but with these names attached it's not hard to think it all should have been better. Or at least, more real.

Score: 5.5/10